Love & Happiness

Almost without thinking about it, many of us have love as one of the most important ingredients in the Universal Happiness Recipe. We want to give love, we want to receive love, but most of all we want to "be in love." And if we were, if we were in love all the time, we think we'd be happy. Hmmmm... maybe.

Love, as the term is usually bantered about, refers to just one type of love -- romantic love, or what the ancient Greek philosophers called eros. Before we even look at another type of love, I think that we can clear up a lot of confusion merely by exploring a few modern myths about romantic love or eros. And, so, here are four of the most prevalent myths:

1) The defining feature of true love is a passion that never fades. True, romantic love is hot and heavy on the passion scale, at least at first. That's why it is so thrilling and so addicting. You are totally enamored by the other person, and your life seems qualitatively different, i.e., a helluva lot better, than it did before they entered it. The only problem is that passion, like everything else in the universe that has a beginning, also has an end. It may burn bright for awhile, a long while, if you're lucky. It may smolder, it may rekindle, it may burst out into an occasional flame, but it will not last at the level of red hot intensity forever. Understanding this simple truth will help you avoid disappointment, depression and dismay, and insure that you don't build your entire edifice of happiness on the shifting sands of passion.

2) If you feel passionate about each other, you should marry. Marriage is a legal and civil agreement. Passion is a physical and very uncivil emotion. Talk about your proverbial oil and water! You don't have to be Margaret Mead in Samoa to see as a participant-observer in our culture that marriage is one of the chief causes of unhappiness! In large part because it is undertaken many times in the heat of passion! Passion is to be enjoyed for as long as it lasts. In that way it contributes to your happiness. Trying to do anything else with passion, other than enjoy it, will surely contribute to your unhappiness.

3) If the passion ceases or diminishes, you should split up because it wasn't true love. If you equate true love with passion, love, like passion, will always end. If you believe that passion is the most important ingredient in your intimate partnerships, then you'll go through a whole shitload of partners! Here's the given -- the passion will diminish. Even if you read all those hokey books like How to Light His Fire or How to Light Her Fire, the passion will diminish. Expecting it not to merely adds to your unhappiness.

4) If you find the right person you'll have passion and romance forever. Yeah, and Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny will all come to your 50th anniversary celebration! The book of Ecclesiastes knew it, The Byrds knew it, and now you know it -- to every thing there is a season. The season of romance and passion is not a 50 year ride. You can have joyful, wonderful  relationships even after the bird of passion has flown the coop. 

And that brings us to the second kind of love that those wise, old, ancient Greek dudes knew all about -- agape. Agape is more about compassion than passion. It has been described as "the affection we feel for those with whom our lives are deeply entwined." Compassion doesn't require kegs of testosterone or minivans full of estrogen to fuel it. Compassion is love unsullied by desire. 

It goes without saying that passion plays an important role in life. Who'd want to live a life without it? What isn't said nearly enough is that while passion is finite, compassion can be infinite. We may feel it first and foremost for those to whom we are closest, but the ripples of compassion can spread outside of our family and our small circle of friends to anyone,  to everyone we encounter. 

True happiness, while experienced individually, is not selfish in nature. Happiness begets, feeds upon and grows more happiness. It's like a positive virus, that has the potential to infect the entire planet. And the carrier is love, love in the form of compassion. 

The feeling of compassion, in and of itself, brings you happiness. The expression of compassion, brings happiness to others, and lo and behold, brings you even more happiness. Then, the person who experiences your compassion is much more likely to be compassionate to others and the happiness virus spreads. 

And before you know it, you are part of a revolution -- the happiness revolution! Compassion rules! And yeah, those bright, wild, crazy flashes of passion, they're pretty nice, too!

How to Make Yourself Really, Really Unhappy!

Want to drive yourself crazy? Want to make yourself really, really unhappy? It's simple -- refuse to accept reality. Try and control that which is out of your control. Do that (and don't we all do that to one extent or another), and I guarantee you that you will be one unhappy dude or dudette.

A couple of posts ago I talked about what is under your control, and, lo and behold, it tuns out that the only thing you even have the possibility to control is you. Your actions and your attitudes are within your sphere of control. Everything else -- no way, Jose!

If you have kids or loved ones or even noisy neighbors, you know that you can't control others. You can at times influence them, in either positive or negative ways, but you can't control them. Your sphere of influence actually includes everyone whose life intersects with yours in anyway whatsoever. In other words you have the potential to influence a whole lot more people than you've ever imagined.

Most of us don't even come close to maximizing our sphere of influence, though. Why? Because we don't do a very good job of controlling ourselves. Your influence is the greatest when your character shines the brightest. When you are impeccable in all your actions and interactions with others, they will be much more open to your influence. Lack integrity, lack self-control, though, and your sphere of influence begins to shrivel.

There is one aspect of our relationship with reality that we can control, however, and it is our interpretation of reality. As happiness researcher and University of Virginia professor Jonathan Haidt says, " Events in the world affect us through our interpretation of them, so if we can control our interpretation, we can control our world." Furthermore, your interpretation is what fuels your action or reaction.

Imagine: You go to work and one of your coworkers is short and snippy and just plain bitchy with you. One interpretation is that she must not like you. Another is that she's just a dyed-in-the-wool, cold-hearted bitch! A third is that she's had a a rough day, week, childhood, or life, and so she's learned dysfunctional behaviors, like taking out her pain on other people. How you treat her will depend to a large degree on your interpretation of how she treats you. 

The worse thing you can do, the thing that is most likely to increase your unhappiness exponentially, is to move beyond just not accepting reality to actively resisting it. Byron Katie, a contemporary spiritual teacher and author, puts it this way: "You scare yourself stuck because what you resists persists." In other words, the energy of your resistance feeds the very thing that you don't like, thus strengthening and perpetuating it. 

So, let's say there's something going on in he world that you don't like -- event, person, whatever. You say or think, either out loud or to yourself,  this thing makes me so unhappy! You've got these tools at your disposal:

1) Acceptance. Even if you're going to actively work to change things, you will have much better leverage if you first accept things as they are.

2) Interpretation. Maybe it's not reality that's gone awry, but merely your interpretation of reality. Change your interpretation to a more positive and empowering one, and like magic your happiness level increases!

3) Expand your sphere of influence. Besides controlling yourself, the way to expand your influence with others is to get to know them, understand them, and really care about them. When they experience you coming from that perpsective, they will be much more open to being influenced by you.

4) Choose not to give a damn! That may sound harsh, but it's a very effective strategy and an integral part of life. When events or people get way too frustrating, you can many times choose to focus your energy, attention and care in another direction. Not giving a damn may not quite be acceptance, but it can be a step in that direction, and a way to free yourself from an enmeshed, reactionary position. 

In conclusion, if you want to make yourself miserable, oppose reality. With the application of simple logic then, we can see that the reverse is also true -- if you want to be happy, accept what is. That doesn't mean you can't work to change it or influence it, it only means that your first step is always acceptance. As Katie says, "When we stop opposing reality, action becomes simple, fluid, kind and fearless." And that's the kind of action out of which true happiness grows. 

The Happiest Place in America

Want to live in the "happiest place in America?" Well, then you're going to have to head west and move to California's 14th Congressional District. According to the Gallup-Healthways Well Being Index, a survey and ranking of all 435 U.S. congressional districts, California's 14th, which includes the towns of Palo Alto, Sunnyvale and Mountain View has the highest levels of happiness or well being. 

On what criteria is this conclusion based? The survey included six dimensions:

1) Life evaluation

2) Emotional health

3) Physical health

4) Healthy behavior

5) Work environment

6) Basic access 

And while you're probably not going to back up the jalopy, ala the Beverly Hillbillies, and head to Sunnyvale, there is quite a bit we can learn from the results of this survey. So, let's walk through the dimensions one by one.

1) Life evaluation. This dimension is fairly simple. Researchers asked participants to rate their life on a 1-10 scale with 10 being the best possible life and 1 being sheer hell. They were then asked to rate what they expect their life to be like five years from now on the same scale. As we've noticed time and time again in the happiness research literature, much of our happiness is based on our own subjective beliefs and feelings about how good our life is. That's why personal habits like choice, focus and gratitude are so important -- they raise our overall evaluation of the quality of our life.

2) Emotional health in this survey was measured by asking respondents about their experience yesterday --- who they were with, what they did, and how they felt. Specifically they were asked whether they experienced:

* Smiling and laughter

* Being treated with respect

* Enjoyment

* Happiness

* Worry

* Sadness

* Anger

* Stress

* Learning or doing something interesting

There was also one question about whether they had ever received a diagnosis of depression. If you look at the nine items listed above it's easy to see which items would help produce greater levels of well being, and which would tend to reduce it. Perhaps the two "sleeper" dimensions are "being treated with respect" and "learning or doing something interesting." As you do an emotional health scan of your own day-to-day life, you might do well to keep those two hidden dimensions in mind.

3) Physical health is an element that we all know has a huge influence on happiness. The components of physical health discussed in this survey were:

* Body Mass Index (BMI)

* Disease burden

* Sick days

* Physical pain

* Daily energy

* History of disease

* Daily health experiences

Obviously some aspects of your physical health are under your control and some are not. As a rule of thumb, though, the physically healthier you are, the happier you are. And that's where the next dimension comes in.

4) Healthy Behaviors. No, there are not 1001 things you have to do to be healthier. In fact, the survey only looked at three major categories of healthy behaviors

* Smoking

* Healthy diet

* Exercise

If you still smoke, you know you're putting your health at risk, and nothing I can say is going to make you quit. It's as simple as can be -- quit smoking, improve your health! And, long term, your happiness. While there are a bunch of conflicting claims out there surrounding diet, the basics are fairly well agreed upon. Michael Pollan pretty well sums it up in his book In Defense of Food when he says "Eat food. Not much. Mostly plants." Exercise comes in all types and varieties. The only really important thing is that you find a style, or styles, of exercise that you like, or can at least tolerate, and do it regularly. Bottom line -- healthier behaviors lead to a happier life.

5) Work Environment is extremely important in terms of your happiness because you spend more time working than doing any other single activity (other than sleeping) throughout the majority of your life. The three components of work life measured by the survey were:

* Satisfaction with the work itself

* Being able to use your strengths in your work

* Working in an organization that has a culture of partnership and trust

To do a personal survey ask yourself: Do you find your work intrinsically satisfying? In other words, irrespective of rewards, pay, feedback, etc. do you just really like what you do? Second, do you get to do the types of things your best at, exhibit your finest qualities and use your most cherished skills? Three, do you feel that you are trusted by your supervisor and co-workers? Do you feel that the organization and its management foster partnership rather than hierarchy? These three factors are the ones that promote the most workplace satisfaction and thus contribute most to your work-related happiness.

6) Basic access. The survey asked participants to respond to 13 questions about access to:

* Food

* Shelter

* Healthcare

* Satisfying place to live

Access to food includes being able to get fresh fruits and vegetables and the distance one has to go to obtain groceries. Shelter with the quality, affordability and general satisfaction with one's housing. Healthcare includes whether or not one has insurance, availability of doctors, dentists, emergency services, etc. And finally, the overall dimension of "satisfying place to live" includes things like parks, recreational opportunities, neighborhood amenities, city resources, etc. And while a place does not have to be perfect for you to be happy, you can improve the overall quality of your city or town by putting energy into improving basic access to these important components of life.

As I've said before, your happiness isn't based on geography. What surveys like this one provide us, though, is a way to improve our own lives and our own communities by looking at the external elements that contribute to happiness and how we can maximize them both individually and collectively. Focus on these six dimensions in your own life, and happier days await you!

Is Happiness Within Your Control?

Here's an interesting question: What do you control in life? When I ask seminar and workshop participants this questions, answers range from "Nothing!" to "Everything! I create my own reality. I control my own destiny!" As usual, when faced with any two extremes, the truth lies closer to the mean. 

With a little reflection, most people agree that about the only thing really control is themself. And even that control may be more theoretical than actual, as anyone who has ever tried to go on a diet, or adopt a new exercise program, knows. 

But, short of someone physically overpowering you, you have the potential to control your own actions. No one can make you do anything. Oh, sure, they can ask, cajole, demand, threaten, etc., but they really can't make you. You control your own actions. And as a rule of thumb, the better you are at controlling your actions, the happier you will be. 

For one, you will do what you really want to do. More enjoyable activities = more happiness. Two, you will do what you really need to do, or have obligated yourself to do. And, even though these actions may not produce immediate gratification, they will add to your long term happiness, in part, at least, by making the people around you happy. Third, controlling yourself, builds your "control muscles," so to speak, and so you begin to produce more and more happiness on an ongoing basis.

The second part of yourself that you can control is your attitudes, your emotions. "Wait just one doggone minute," I hear some of you protesting, "I can't control my feelings. Sometimes I just feel hurt, or angry, or sad, and it's not under my control." OK, I believe you. We've all had experiences where something happens and an instantaneous feeling flares up and overwhelms us. Sometimes our immediate feelings are not under our control, but the overall emotional tenor of our life is. And it all has to do with our thoughts.

Imagine that you're driving to work, doing your best Jeff Gordon imitation because you just happen to be a couple of minutes late. All of a sudden, someone pulls out in front of you in a (insert brand of car you don't like here), and you have to slam your brakes damn near through the floorboard in order to avoid a fiery, bloody crash. Adrenaline pumps through your blood stream, the fight or flight response kicks in, and all of a sudden you are so damn angry that you'll kick the Dalai Lama's ass, if he so much as looks at you sideways. 

But within seconds the chemicals that flooded your body and brain subside. Now you are back in control, and what you choose to feel is up to you, up to what you choose to think. You could think "That son-of-a-bitching (insert deragatory term for religious, racial or ethnic group you don't like here) he almost killed me!" And then your mind is off to the races blaming, screaming, feeling sorry for itself, and starting into its litany of everything that's wrong with the world. 

Or, you could choose to be relieved. "Whew! Close call." Or grateful "Thank God, I wasn't killed." It's up to you. How you feel about, describe, talk about, and even remember, the accident that never really happened, is completely up to you. And it's easy to see which type of responses would produce immediate and long term happiness and which would have the exact opposite effect.

Sure, there are alot of other things in the world over which you have little or no control, but so what? We'll talk about those another time. For now just focus on yourself. What are the actions and attitudes over which you'd like to exert more control? What opportunities do you have to build your control muscles day-to-day by doing so? 

Focus upon yourself, not in a selfish way but in a positive way, in a way where you take more responsibility for what you do and feel, and thus more responsibility for your own happiness. If a good portion of your happiness is in your own hands, think how much easier it is for you to be happy. Do things that make you happy. Let the positive thoughts you choose to think be the building blocks for the overall emotional tenor of your life. 

Experiment. Have fun with it. Being all deadly serious ain't going to make you happy! Learn to control yourself, increase your happiness. It's as simple as that. 

Out of Gratitude Happiness Grows

Dozens of times a day I'm reminded that happiness is a function of focus. Walking down the street I can choose to focus upon the cigarette butts and fast food wrappers in the gutter or the endless, azure blue sky above. Talking with the person next to me in line at the coffee shop I can focus upon their whiney, negative tone or upon the slice of Spirit than shines surreptitiously within them.

Happiness is all about choices. And that's where gratitude comes in. We have so friggin' much to be grateful for that most of the time, we forget to be grateful at all! We take it all for granted. I recently received an email from a friend who about a year ago moved to Australia. She was all excited because the house they've just rented, unlike the house they had been living in for the last year, has central heat, air conditioning, a washer & dryer, and plenty of hot water. The things that many of us just assume our lives will always contain are the very things for which others feel profound gratitude. 

Though gratitude as an emotion is always felt in the now, the mental focus that produces gratitude, and thus happiness, can be upon the past, present or future. So, let's look at each of these chronological arenas to see how we can harvest gratitude across the full spectrum of time.

1) Past. Close your eyes and take a minute to think about all the people, places and things in your past that you are truly grateful for. Yes, I mean really do that right now. Don't keep reading -- do the damn exercise! Thank you.

Your past is a veritable gold mine of gratitude. Family, friends, teachers, authors, artists, musicians -- all kinds of people have played important roles in your life and have helped you become who you are today. As Margaret Visser writes in her new book The Gift of Thanks: Roots and Rituals of Gratitude, "Gratitude is always about paying attention, deliberately beholding and appreciating the other." Remembering them on a regular basis will not only increase your happiness, but also encourage you to show some of that same kindness to others, thus producing an across-time, happiness ripple effect. 

One other thing you can do with past gratitude. Take time to thank those "past people" who still fill your heart with gratitude today. If they're still alive, send them a note or a letter. No, not an email, and surely not a truncated, little text. Actually write out your thanks in your own handwriting (you know "cursive," like you learned in second grade) and mail it to them. If they're already dead just send them a silent prayer or message of gratitude. The past may be gone, but the gratitude, and its impact upon your happiness, remains. All you've got to do is focus upon it.

2) Present. Look around. What do you currently have in your life that you're thankful for? People, places, things, opportunities, experiences -- the list is endless. And yet, most days, thanks and gratitude is the furthest thing from our minds. A huge part of gratitude is just noticing. Standing in the hot shower after my morning walk, the thought spontaneously erupted, "Damn, I like showers!" Small things, little things, forgotten things, and nearly invisible things, are all things to which we are unconsciously grateful.

Here's another simple exercise that will build your gratitude muscles and make you happier. Each day think of five things you're grateful for. And be creative. Don't say your dog and beer everyday! Five things that warm your heart or bring a smile to your face that are in your life today. Don't have five things? Time to change your life!

The point is so obvious I'm almost embarrassed to belabor it -- each and everyday our lives are filled with an incredible richness of things about which we can be thankful. Want to be happier? Focus upon those things.

3) Future. How can the future make you happier, it isn't even here yet? Enter the wonderful mental power of anticipation. Think about all the cool, fun, interesting and exciting things you're planning to do. Sure, you haven't done them yet, but just anticipating doing them gives you a nice underlying hum of happiness. Aren't you grateful for all these upcoming opportunities that await you?

One of the most interesting things about anticipation is that so many times we get more happiness from anticipating an event than we do from the event itself. We can get through many a boring day at work anticipating the fun of the upcoming holidays. But then when the holidays arrive and we are stuck for days eating too much, arguing too much, and watching way too much sports with our crazy, dysfunctional family, the stark, cold reality sets in! By the time New Years rolls around, we're starting to believe the old adage that your friends are God's way of apologizing for your family!

Gratitude is a simple thing. So simple that it gets covered over by the busyness and chaos of our lives.  Want to experience the maximum of happiness in your life? Focus upon all you have to be grateful for in each of these three arenas -- your past, your present, and your future. Fill your head, your heart, your day with thoughts of gratitude. Thanksgiving is just around the proverbial corner. Why wait? Start being thankful today. 

The Happiness Formula

Martin Seligman is the father of  Positive Psychology. An author and University of Pennsylvania professor, he started the nation's first Positive Psychology degree program. And, like any good social scientist, he likes to use formulas. He's even come up with a formula for happiness. Here it is:

H = S + C + V

Got it? Good. Oh, you want some explanation? OK, here's a quick run through.

"H" obviously stands for happiness. "S" is your Happiness Set Point that we talked about in couple of previous posts. "C" stands for conditions, and "V" is voluntary activities. So, what Dr. Seligman is telling us is that your overall happiness is a combination of  your happiness set point, the conditions of your life, and the voluntary activities in which you partake. Let's explore this a bit further. 

Your happiness set point, as you probably remember, is biological in nature. It's a sort of genetic given. It's the innate level of happiness to which you automatically return over time, even after something super wonderful or something tragic happens in your life. Think of it as the level of happiness at which you are most comfortable. 

Now, while there's some level of disagreement over whether you can change your happiness set point, most researchers seems to think that without a concerted and conscious program of self-transformation, it's consistent throughout your lifetime.

Conditions include both personal conditions and life conditions. Some personal conditions like height, eye color, male pattern baldness, etc. are unchangeable. Other external conditions can be changed but are subject to what's called "the adaption principle." This means that you do something like increase your income or buy a bigger house, and at first it makes you really happy, but then you become used to it, and it no longer gives you a thrill. You've become "adapted" to it, and so you return to your happiness set point.

There are certain conditions, though, whose presence makes for unhappiness in almost everyone, and if you change these conditions your increased happiness is not subject to the adaption principle. They include:

* Noise. Especially variable and intermittent noise. Though we tend to adapt to the constant flow of traffic or Muzak, or consistent background noise, loud variable and intermittent noise drives most of us crazy. If you live or work in a place where you're victimized by it, move to a different environment and you will be happier, not just initially but forever. 

* Commuting. No one really likes it; some people handle it better than others. Especially if your commute is driving in heavy traffic, it more than likely has a negative impact on your day-to-day happiness. Not only that, it take minutes, and many times hours, out of your day, hours that can be used to do things, and be with people, you really enjoy. Reduce, or better yet eliminate, your commute, and you'll be happier.

* Control. Feeling out of control? Then you're probably also feeling unhappy. Increase your control over yourself and/or certain elements of your life, and you'll be happier. And it's not just the big elements that count. While I won't go into in any depth here, a research study found that allowing nursing home patients to care for, and choose when to water, plants made them happier than just putting plants in their rooms and having the staff take care of and water them. To find out more see Ellen Langer's groundbreaking book, Mindfulness. 

* Body image shame. Feel ashamed of your body? Do something about it. If you make permanent changes to how you view your body -- through exercise, dietary habits, even plastic surgery -- you will increase your long term happiness. 

* Relationships. Increase both the strength and number of your relationships, and you will be happier. Seligman and other researchers all attest that this is the most important of all the conditions. People make people happy. Who'd' have thunk it? This is such an important condition of happiness that soon I'll devote an entire post to it. We all have our own ways of building relationships and making new relationships -- ways that have worked well for us in the past. So, for now, consciously undertake some of these tried an true methods. You know, pull a Nike and just do it!

Ah, but we still have the voluntary activities component to explain. Well, really, not much explanation is needed. You increase your happiness when you do things you love to do. One distinction is important, however -- the distinction between pleasures and gratifications.

Pleasures have both sensory and emotional components. They include things like food, sex, and cool breezes. The "problem" with pleasures is that you soon reach a saturation point. So, in order for them to continue to bring you pleasure, you must schedule enough time between pleasures that they maintain their potency. The point is to enjoy pleasures when you can, but don't overburden them and expect them to be your only happiness-inducing activities.  

Gratifications are activities that help you get into a flow experience. Gratifications include activities like meditation, exercise, playing music, etc. that fully engage you by calling upon you to use and develop your strengths and potentials. They also assist you in both defining and growing your self. Gratifications are not subject to saturation.  Choose to do those activities that produce gratification, and you'll be much happier than if you merely fill your life with pleasures. In other words, happiness comes through growth.

So, there it is, a fairly wordy explanation of Seligman's simple formula H = S + C + V. Forget the S component for now. Focus upon the C's you can control and that aren't subject to the adaption principle and undertake activities that provide you true gratification. Do so, and happy may soon be your middle name!

The Geography of Happiness

Does it matter where you live? Are people in certain states happier than people in other states? It seems so, at least according to research undertaken by Janson Rentfrow and his colleagues at Cambridge University in England. 

So, which state do you think is the happiest? Surprise -- Utah! Maybe that magic underwear that all those Mormons wear not only helps them get into heaven but makes them happier, too! The citizens of Utah averaged 69.2 points on the 100 point happiness scale, beating Hawaii (68.2) by a full point. Now, happiness in Hawaii, that makes sense. But number three is another surprise, at least to my way of thinking -- Wyoming! Yee hah! In fact, six of the top ten states are Western states. 

The unhappiest state? West Virginia, followed closely by Kentucky. I guess having a meth lab in your double-wide doesn't necessarily make you happy. Fewer teeth and increased paranoia, yes. More happiness, no.

Why are the denizens of the Western states so joyful and jolly? The researchers identified three factors that most of the happiest states share:

* Greater wealth

* Higher levels of education

* More tolerance

1) Greater wealth. Time and time again happiness researchers have been quick to point out that wealthier people aren't necessarily happier people, so what gives? Well, it's not the wealth itself that creates happiness but what the wealth can accomplish. Wealthier states can afford better infrastructure. Things like better roads, more parks, higher levels of social service and superior community enhancements. Furthermore, on an individual level wealthier people get better health care and are on the whole healthier, and thus happier, than their poorer, sicker counterparts. 

2) Higher levels of education. One of my favorite definitions of education comes from Ralph Tyler who said, "You can tell you're being educated if your options are increasing." Better educated people have more options when it comes to life choices. They can be more true to their individual likes, dislikes and preferences. They know themselves and their world better, and so can make more fulfilling choices. Finally, like wealthier people, better educated folks are healthier because they take better care of themselves and get better health care. 

3) More tolerance. Most of the happiest states are tolerant states. Citizens feel freer to express themselves there. Other than Utah, and perhaps Wyoming, all of the top ten happiest states have a greater percentage of bohemians than your average, less happy state. Happier states, on the whole, welcome artists, gays, and foreign born individuals, and support, or at least tolerate, their out-of-the-ordinary behaviors and lifestyles. 

Finally, one important factor that happy states tested particularly low on  -- neuroticism. Highest on the neuroticism scale? You guessed it, West Virginia & Kentucky! Followed closely by Mississippi. Hmmm, do we see a pattern here? High tolerance, low neuroticism. Low tolerance, high neuroticism. Sure makes both logical and intuitive sense.

So, should we all pack up the Volvo and move to Utah? Not so fast. While geography may have some influence upon your overall level of happiness,especially if you're of a bohemian bent, we can also individually apply the lessons learned form this research.

Make enough money to follow your dreams and get good health care. Pursue education, both formally and informally, and take advantage of your increasing options. Tolerate, or better yet, support, those who believe, act, and live differently than you do, as long as they aren't infringing upon your rights. And, oh yeah, take a pass on any neurotic tendencies you might have.

The bottom line is that you can be happy anywhere. Wealth, education, and tolerance might just increase your odds some. And living around others who also exhibit these three qualities might even up your odds a bit more. But moving to Utah, let's not get drastic!