Ten Secrets to Finding Happiness

Everybody wants to be happy! Even the readers of U.S. News & World Report. So on July 22nd of this year, the magazine ran an article on Ten Secrets to Finding Happiness. While we've covered some of these before, it's always good to have a reminder or two as to what really are the ingredients of happiness. As you read these, do a Self Audit in which you ask your self which of the secrets you've been neglecting lately, and how you might increase your happiness by giving these elements just a bit more attention.

 Without further ado, a summary of the Ten Secrets along with a bit of commentary from yours truly:

 1) Spend money on experiences rather than things. It's simple: You feel more alive and energized by skiing, traveling, going to a play, than you do from the latest gizmo or gadget that Madison Avenue is hawking. Also, experiences have more of an incomparable quality, while someone will always have a bigger TV, fancier cell phone, or more chic purse than you. Better to have a life rich in experience and poor in stuff than the other way around.

 2) Set and pursue meaningful life goals. Wealth, fame and improved personal appearance are shallow, meaningless goals that do very little to produce long term happiness. On the other hand, goals that encompass personal growth, service to other, and intrinsic joy are the building blocks of the good life.

 3) Be open and receptive to the here and now. To do so, to nourish present-centered awareness, you must drop judgement and worry. Simply perceive and observe, what is happening in the present moment, and you will be amazed at the joy that is inherent in it. Happiness is never in the past or the future. Happiness is always, right here, right now.

 4) Build meaningful relationships. People with joyful lives surround themselves with joyful and supportive people. Happiness increases when you have people you can count on and when you experience a sense of belonging. 

 5) Recognize and capitalize on your strengths. You have both internal characteristics and external skills that help make you who you are. The mere expression of these characteristics and use of these skills will bring you joy, regardless of any outcomes you produce. The more you express your essential nature, your true self, the happier you will be!

 6) Count your blessings. The formula is straightforward and simple -- gratitude increases happiness. Stop, think, and literally count all the blessings in your life, all the people, places, ideas and things for which you are grateful. Take this gratitude inventory everyday. I like to do it while exercising; it helps make the time go faster and exercises my heart in two ways at once.

 7) Keep an optimism journal. Take a few minutes each day to write down positive interpretations of seemingly negative events. You know, practice the old glass is half full perspective, even when you don't have a friggin' glass! Also write about the positive changes that you are making or plan to make in your life.  Keep your spirits up by getting the words down.

 8) Ask others advice. Want to know what will make you happy, ask others what makes them happy. Did they like that new Thai restaurant? Was the cruise worth the money?  Sure, not everyone has the same emotional responses to things as you do, but friends, family, neighbors, and even film critics can sometimes clue you into how you'll respond to a given experience.

 9) Get out and sweat! You know it, I know it, all God's children know it -- exercise releases endorphins and other mood altering chemicals that make you feel so good you put James Brown to shame! It's the first step out of the old Lazy Boy Recliner that's the hardest. Just remember that research shows that "burning off 350 calories three times a week in sustained, sweat-inducing activity can reduce symptoms of depression about as effectively as antidepressants." Feeling, down? Get up, and move, move, move!

 10) Do small acts of kindness. Help someone else feel better, and you'll feel better, too. Happiness is way more contagious than H1N1 virus, and it's a beautiful kind of contagion. Even when you're not feeling happy, helping others can bring happiness to two -- them and you. As the bumper sticker says, "Practice random acts of kindness." What else you got to do?

 Ten secrets may seem like alot, but no doubt you're doing some of these things already. Focus on the ones you're not doing, and try them out, even if they seem like a bit of a stretch at first, and find out what happens. You are your own semi-scientific happiness experiment. Your life is your petrie dish. Plant the seeds of happiness and watch them grow!